I just saw a book on the reserve cart at the library titled "Diaper Free By 3"
And once again I wondered: "WHY?"

What is the obsession about toilet training at an early age?

I know diapers are costly. I know diapers are a pain in the neck. I know it's not fun handling pee and poop.
But is it any more pleasant to handle it on your rugs or on your kids clothing?

It's a heckuva lot easier to deal with a diaper change when traveling than it is with a kid who needs to be held on the toilet--especially if the rest rooms are less than shiny bright clean.

It's a lot easier to clean up your child at a diaper change than it is to deal with an accident in their pants.
Easier to check and see if they're wet rather than having to ask every 30 seconds "do you need to go potty?"

Kids who "train" late are just as smart as kids who train early. There's less of a power struggle in an older kid. There's better communication.

if your kid truly has bladder/bowel control, excellent communication skills and really WANT to do so at age 2, fine. Go for it. But as the mom of two (reasonably intelligent) girls trained AFTER age 3 who had NO accidents once they had learned, I say this to the rest of you.

Stop obsessing. And stick with the diapers.

Virginia is WEIRD. We have incredible wealth and the most grinding of poverty. Areas of rich diversity and other areas where folks still don't seem to have heard that the South lost the "War of Northern Aggression".

I've lived here 21 years. The first election I voted in was the one in which George Bush #1 took Virginia easily. The first election where the Presidential candidate I voted for won Virginia was 2008.

So I'm not surprised that we're going to get another nasty conservative Republican jackass for the next four years in this state.

But it didn't have to be so.

The fact is, that the same voters who were galvanized by the Obama campaign, who were dazzled by being part of such a charismatic movement, were bored by Creigh Deeds. 

They didn't see themselves as part of history. They didn't see any entertainment in it. There was no "Deeds Girl", no fabulous "Yes, We Can" slogan. No massive movement on Facebook or MySpace.

So instead of spending a few minutes to vote yesterday, they went home to watch something incredibly deep that they'd TIVOed--perhaps the latest episode of "Dancing With the Stars", or to Twitter about their latest bowel movement, or to wail on their blogs about how all the instant change they expected after Obama got into office hasn;t happened.

The Republicans are NOT Obama's worst enemy. 
The indifferent, apathetic, short attention spanned Democrats and Independants who have not stood up over the past year and shouted to the heavens  as one voice their indignation over what has been going on up on Capitol Hill and on the airwaves are what are doing us in.

We've seen teabaggers interrupting town hall meetings and marching on D.C. Where are the counter-demonstrations?

Where are the masses marching to say "We WANT health care. We WANT support for the unemployed and we want the fat cats of the banks and Wall Street to BECOME the unemployed--and without any golden parachutes either"?

They're home, in the words of the #1 song I hated: "Waiting for the world to change"

Nice going, folks.

Perhaps I AM meaner and stricter than all the mothers around here. Quite possible from what I've seen.

But when I take you and Mr Wonderful to the mall and instead of staying there, you take the Metro into DC and "go for a walk" around the monuments, what do you expect?

I was all prepared to let you go with him to DC and go to the Newseum. It's just that you didn't have your plans in place early enough, and getting at 2PM to a museum that costs $13 admission and closes at 5PM was not a good plan.

And I had point blank said you couldn't just wander around. You needed somewhere to go when making a trip like that for the first time. And we needed to know where you were!

SC, you violated our trust. You want more freedom, but you can't be trusted to do as you're told and to not do things we've told you not to do.

And it's got nothing to do with the fact that you were with Mr Wonderful, though you think that explains everything on both sides. I'd be just as pissed if you'd done this with any of your female friends!

So you're not going to be taking any more weekend trips with the boy. You're not going to the movies, or anywhere out of the neighborhood, even if there is "nothing to do" around here.

Hope you had a great time, baby. Because it's going to have to last you until your 15th birthday in February. I'm not even sure I'm going to let you see him outside of school.

Damnit, I wish your Nanay was here to help me on this. But my guess is that she's cheering me on, wherever she is.

I know you're mad at me. I can deal with it. Because I'm thinking of what I need to do to raise you to be a responsible, thinking adult.

And I love you with all my heart--more than you will ever know.

Mom

Carrot cake, that is.
Normally I'm a chocolate person--you can fill up a Halloween dish with candy and if it's candy corn and the like I'll just yawn.

But JR and I had carrot cake this spring--at  Easter brunch, I think--and she's been begging me to make one ever since.

This recipe came via Baking Bites , but I've tweaked it a bit.  Instead of spending time peeling and shredding carrots, I buy packaged matchstick carrots (you can buy them in the produce section next to the baby carrots) dump the batter in the food processor and mix it. This breaks up the carrots and aerates the cake, making it lighter and fluffier. You could do the same with a blender--and I may even try mixing the batter entirely in the processor next time.
I added walnuts to the recipe--toss them in after processing or they will be too finely chopped. And instead of the recommended cream cheese frosting I  substituted a simpler version that is healthier AND tastes delicious.

Since we've had a difficult week at work with our new computer system (on top of our chronic staff shortage) and all my Halloween programs, I made this cake, sprinkled black and orange sprinkles on top and called it "Halloween Carrot Cake". And I sent another one to the Halloween party SC and the Man attended on Halloween.

Even without the sprinkles this cake is simple and delicious any time of the year.

Carrot Cake (adapted from "Baking Bites" version of the "Cook's Country" recipe)

2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon
1 cup brown sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup canola oil
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
1 bag matchstick cut carrots
1/4- 1/2 cup chopped walnuts (optional)

In a large bowl, combine brown sugar, eggs, oil and applesauce and mix well.
Combine the flour, baking powder/soda, salt and cinnamon in a bowl and add it to the sugar/eggs mix.
Mix to blend.
Pour batter into a large food processor. Add the carrots and process until carrots are finely chopped.
Pour batter into a greased 9x13 baking pan. If adding walnuts, sprinkle them across the top, then stir in gently with a large spoon.

Bake at 350 for 25-28 minutes (28 seems right in my oven) until a toothpick inserted near center comes out clean.

Let cake cool before frosting. It's fine without frosting though--or try topping with whipped cream!

Cream Cheese Frosting (from "Gina's Weight Watcher Recipes")
Note: No matter what my mom thinks, "fat free" cream cheese is nasty in taste and texture. Plus it's full of chemicals. "Light" cream cheese though tastes fine and works fine here.

1 cup confectioner's sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1 pkge (8oz) Neufchatel (reduced fat) Cream Cheese

Combine ingredients and beat together with a hand or stand mixture.
Frost cooled cake. Refrigerate to set frosting--and don't leave this out of the fridge too long.
Especially if you put sugar sprinkles. They will melt  and leave weird colored streaks on your cake.

All right, I'm going to let you hear my not-so-dulcet tones because I can't find a recording of this song anywhere.

I sing this all month long in October (and into November) at my programs for kids 12-24 months, and in late October at the programs for the bigger kids. Moms have told me their kids love this song, and I know that it was a favorite for SC and JR both when they were little.

The pictures show my marvelous bulletin board. I am sorry that I have not shown it all year--it has developed from a spring vegetable garden through a summer of "tomatoes" and "peppers" and now is a fall pumpkin patch. It's been fun, and now I have lots of stuff ready to reuse next year. Plus a few other pictures of room decor and one of "Baby" @ Halloween. And yes, those are her human "sisters" in the pictures behind her.

Enjoy!

I have had a very long day today. I've been helping to discharge and sort  the billions of books we've been unable to discharge for the last 3 days while we were transitioning from one circ system to the other. I've been helping other staff figure out the new circulation system, hauling bins of books and generally getting a workout. Oh, and I did the last of 5 Halloween story hours this afternoon--I did two a day for the last 2 days as well.

I'm tired, and it's cold and dark, and I needed comforting food for dinner.

Picadillo is a ground beef based dish that I've discovered is made all over the Latin world. And that includes the Phillipines--I have to ask the Man about that.

The version I make is a simplified version of the already simple version from the "Desperation Dinner" ladies. Ground beef, a can of stewed tomatoes, raisins (really)some frozen peas and some chopped frozen onions are the base of this dish, but it's the spices that make it sing.

Cinnamon, coriander and cumin blend together. They perfume the air, bringing me comfort even before I've heaped a serving on rice in my nice dark blue ceramic bowl.

I sit down to eat and feel the comfort.

Picadillo For A Dark Chilly Night
(adapted from "Desperation Dinners" by Beverly Mills & Alicia Ross)

1 1/4- 1 1/2 pounds ground beef (your choice of leanness depending on your budget and your diet)
3/4 cup chopped frozen onions
1 t chopped bottled garlic
1/2 t black pepper
1/2 t ground cumin
1/8 t ground cinnamon
1/8 t ground cloves
1/2 cup frozen green peas
1 can (14 oz) stewed tomatoes
1/4 cup raisins
1/4 cup white wine (Optional)
1/4 cup sliced green olives (Optional. I don't use them--the Man & I don't like them much)

Spray a large deep frying pan/skillet with cooking spray.
Add the frozen onions and cook over a low flame, stirring frequently.
As the onions begin to cook and give off water, add the ground beef.
Raise the heat to medium and keep stirring and turning the ground beef until it is browned.
Stir in the garlic and the ground spices. Add the peas, tomatoes, raisins and if you're adding wine or olives, toss them in too.
Let the mix come to a boil, then reduce the heat and simmer for 4-5 more minutes, stirring. There should be some liquid, but it shouldn't be soup like.

Serve over rice. This keeps beautifully and tastes even better leftover--that's what I'm eating tonight.

JR is home with what is probably a stomach ache and no more--we've all had similar things over the last week or two.

The Man is home with her because I had to come to work and do my "Halloween" programs.
And truthfully, coming in for my toddler program was a waste of my time--kids running amok and adults barely participating. And I resent having to be here rather than home with my girl.

H1N1 is in the schools--though the school system says numbers are low so far. And I am afraid.

Both of the girls are boundingly healthy--have been since entering elementary school. But when they get sick, they've been known to get really sick. JR in particular has been known to run high fevers, and for the last two years I've gotten them seasonal flu shots along with mine and the Man's.

JR's school immunized the K-1 set, but so far hasn't gotten enough serum to do the older kids. The date for SC's school isn't even on the calendar yet. Probably some time in November.

I am on edge, watching them for signs of illness, breathing a sigh of relief when JR's temperture showed normal this AM, worrying that she could develop a fever later today.

They are having a flu immunization clinic on Saturday. The girls are eligible to get shots and as someone with asthma I am qualified as well.

I am going to go early and see if waiting on line for several hours really might get us the shots. And if so, all 3 of us will get them.

And then I might start to breathe normally again.

Until then, I am afraid.

Bought any "Baby Einstein" DVDs since 2004?

Well, if you have, according this NY Times article the Disney Corporation is now ready to admit that your child just might not have been turned into a genius through watching this stuff, and is offering you a refund.

I want to make it crystal clear that I am not anti-TV. And while I cheer the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation that kids under 2 get no screen time at all, I know damned well that in most households, little kids are going to get their share of Elmo, Dora and the Purple Dinosaur Who Shall Not Be Named. The realities of life with small children ensure that the TV is on in most houses at least PART of the day. Certainly my own two girls got theirs--though said Purple Dinosaur somehow never showed up on the TV at our house.

But anything for kids labeled with the word "Einstein" or "Genius" has always raised my bullshit meter to its highest level, and I have not purchased any of it for the library. The other branches have it--people can ask for it if they want it.

That anyone would demand a refund because these DVDs didn't turn their kids into ready-for-college-by-kindergarten kids is pathetic.

And why would they ever want their kids to be geniuses?
Brains are important. Intellect is important. But it's more important to focus on what will help our kids grow up to be well adjusted, fairly happy adults.

And that's not something you can buy in the video store--or get in a book from the library.
That's what comes from us, as parents. And it's damned hard work. No shortcuts.

Yesterday we had a weird guy who kept trying to lie down on the floor and read. Bad enough in the adult area, but on the floor in the children's room--right next to our "Papa San" sofa?

JR was with me at work and I kept her in my office until he'd left--and that wasn't until he'd been told he couldn't do that by me, the reference librarian and the guy at the circulation desk.

We HAVE had sleepers on the floor before--we attract a lot of homeless folks. Last year we had to deal with a guy who'd rolled out a sleeping bag under a desk in the quietest corner of the adult department. Sad, but also funny.

On the other hand, this afternoon I've had a Muslim mom and dad taking turns to say their prayers on a rug they put in the isolated back corner of my room where the stuffed toys USED to be. And that's just fine with me.........

Well, sort of--we're going on a new circulation system next week and have an off-line system to practice on.

Kind of fun billing the POTUS for an overdue library book. Certainly a lot more fun that it will be next week when we are off-line for at least 3 days.
Feh.......